We enter the Oval Office to see Barack Obama patting himself on the back pleased about the previous days speech.
Obama – Did you see it Joe? I mean did you see it? I had those suckers eating right out of my hand.
Biden – Yes Boss, I saw it.
Obama – They were waiting for everything I could give them. Hanging on every word, I feel invincible.
Biden – Well sir before you turn into the invincible man there, you might need to know something.
Obama – What? Tell me Joe, what do I need to know?
Biden – Well those were all union folks you were talking to.
Obama – That’s right and unions love me.
Biden – Well that and the fact that we paid them to attend.
Obama – Paid them, of course they were well paid they attended and received knowledge and understanding.
Biden – Not to mention overtime pay, at three times their normal pay rate and a tuna sandwich.
Obama – Tuna sandwich?
Biden – We figured tuna was best.
Obama – Why tuna?
Biden – Cause everyone thinks there is something fishy about you.
Obama – So when I blamed the republicans and they cheered they were paid to cheer.
Biden – Yep every time.
Obama – Every time?
Biden – Every time you blamed the republicans, all three hundred ninety million four hundred seventy three thousand two hundred and forty one times that you blamed the republicans for something.
Obama – So what are you saying Joe?
Biden – They only cheered because there was something in it for them.
Obama – Well the American people still love me.
Biden – The crazy woman in Georgia doesn’t count.
Obama – Darn it.
Biden – It will be alright boss look on the bright side.
Obama – What bright side?
Biden – We still draw our salaries for the rest of our lives.
Obama – Yeah and we can do speaking tours like Bill does.
Biden – Well actually that wouldn’t work out.
Obama – Because I would be needed on a world stage?
Biden – No…
Obama – Because the UN would want my vast knowledge?
Biden – No…
Obama – Because Oprah would want me for a regular guest?
Biden – No…
Obama – Then why would speaking tours not work out for me?
Biden – Well number one people like Bill, number two your teleprompter would require too much trouble to set up and number three, even people that voted for you hope you fade into obscurity so as not to remind them of their own stupidity.
Obama – Ooooh.
Tune in next time when we hear Rick Perry of Texas say. Dammit Biden I am not the former lead singer for Journey, I will not, I repeat I will not sing Wheel In The Sky.